Something’s coming between us

I’m becoming more and more of a podcast fan. One of my current favourites is Note to Self. It explores the impact of technology on our lives and how we can make smart choices about technology.

This morning on my walk to work I listened to an interview with Sherry Turkle, a sociologist, educator and psychologist, who has just written a book called Reclaiming Conversation: The power of talk in a digital age 

This is not a negative book, but it does ask some interesting questions about how technology, and smart phones especially, are impacting on our relationships.

One interesting fact is that when two people are having a conversation and there is a phone on the table in between them it will impact on the level of empathy between the two people, even if it’s switched to silent. Turkle says that this is the case even if the phone is in the periphery of your vision. The phone is a visual reminder that someone is not fully focused on you and what you are saying. It’s competing for the owners attention, even when it’s not ringing.

I noticed this yesterday when some lovely friends were visiting. One person’s phone vibrated very quietly and very frequently the whole time she was there and although she never once looked at it, I felt it was demanding her attention in a seductive and insistent way. I really wanted to take it off the table and pop it in her handbag, but I felt that my response was a bit childish or maybe old fashioned. Now I know that my reaction was completely normal which makes me feel better.

I’m as bad as the next person with checking my phone, but to be honest I have all of my notifications turned off so it’s not always seeking my attention. I just don’t think I’d get any work done if my phone was pinging all day. I don’t think I’m strong enough to resist peeking, so for me it’s better to have the notifications turned off.

I have two questions for you..

Firstly, do you ever put your phone away – completely out of sight and out of mind? Or is your phone always on and usually within reach

Secondly, do you have any great podcasts that you’d like to share?

Let me know, I’d love to hear what you think.

 

 

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