Please don’t send me your chain letter

Please don’t send me your chain letter

I was ranting to my husband this morning about all the “tasks” being assigned on FaceBook whereby people are asked to post pictures of their favourite albums or book covers WITHOUT ANY EXPLANATION!

I was annoyed because I couldn’t understand how posting a picture of a book you loved, but not telling me why you loved it, doesn’t tell me very much about who you are and what you like to read. It’s a bit like going to book group and then not being allowed to talk about the book.

My husband gently explained that the requirement to post without comment was designed to lower the entry barrier so that people could participate without getting too anxious or feeling judged about their choices. He said it takes a lot of confidence to express your feelings and opinions and the ‘rule’ about not making comments makes it easier for people to join in.

“It’s all right for you and your family” he said. “You can all write, and heaven knows you all have opinions and aren’t afraid to share them”. Too true. We all have a lot to say and we aren’t backward in coming forward, as my mother used to say.

Chastened, I’ve had to change my stance on this FaceBook phenomena.

A friend has tagged me to share five of my favourite books and I can’t wait to do just that. I did complain about not being able to make any comments, but she said I could do whatever I liked, which is good because I’m not very good at conforming to rules.

I thought briefly about sharing the titles of books that I’d like to read, rather than books I’d actually read, just to make it more interesting, but that might confuse people so I’ll try to stick to the rules as much as I can. If you’d like to know which books I recommend, there’s a list here.

On the other hand, I have yet to be convinced about the value or worth of all these email chain letters that are going around. If you aren’t familiar with these, then let me explain that they usually ask you to share something with a person you’ve never met and then send the request on to 20 of your friends to share with 20 of their friends. The idea is that you’ll get a number of recipes, inspirational quotes or poems from people that you’ve never met. It’s a bit like pyramid selling without the selling.

 I thought I was the only person who dislikes chain letters, but it turns out that I’m not.

My friend said that she had received one about sending inspirational quotes to support and empower women, but she didn’t understand quite what she was supposed to do (the instructions weren’t very clear) so instead of feeling good about herself she said she felt stupid and uninspired.

Nothing is more disempowering that feeling dumb.

Another friend chipped in and said that she loved the idea of supporting other women, but she didn’t like the vaguely threatening tone of the email or the time limits. She also said she felt bad for women who don’t actually have 20 friends. What if you only have five friends?

Chain letters often contain high levels of emotional blackmail. If you don’t send the email on you will “break the chain” (be a bad person) or you’ll suffer some kind of bad luck.

The chain letter craze started in the USA in the late 19th Century and often involved people distributing cures for various ailments or asking for small amounts of money.

It may surprise you to know that chain letters asking for money (even small amounts) or any kind of valuable goods are illegal in the United States and were banned in Queensland in 1935. The other states of Australia thought that they were a craze that would die out naturally, with one prominent NSW Police Officer stating, “there’s a fool born every minute but there’s a limit to the credulity of the public”. I often wonder about this given that people still seem to feel obliged to send chain letters on, even when they don’t want to.

I’m not suggesting that a recipe swapping chain letter is by any means illegal, but they can be annoying (especially if you get the same one three times) so please don’t send them to me.

I think the intention behind empowering women with inspirational quotes is lovely, so if you feel like sharing some love, just send a nice email to your (five or more) friends. They don’t have to be women. I’m sure they will appreciate that you are thinking about them.

Alternatively, just put your nice inspirational quote on FB or Instagram and share it with the world.